Is it just me or do the majority of teens today think the world owes them something? I know a lot of really good kids but they all seem to think they deserve a cell phone, freedom to do as they please, a new car, the best clothes. Are we giving to much to our kids these days?

I think it's a normal teen thing. I remember going through that stage myself. I thought my parents were total idiots who were clueless about the world. I was selfish and only thought of my needs and wants. UG! It's the second age of independence. Remember the defiance in toddlerhood? LOL! I've been starting to read up on this because my kids are almost there. Yikes!

http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/growth/growing/adolescence.html

yep just today we were in the great hall at church. Where they do all the classes and such, its seperate form the church, well they were throwing a basketball around and almost hit one of the toddlers that were walking around. Another lady from the nursery told them to knock it off that they almost hit a baby. THey gave her the most horrid look and then threw the ball at the wall and walked away like they were so entitled to do what they wanted!

I agree with Trina, a lot of it has to do with seeking out Independence as normal phase of being an adult. Every kid is going to handle it different and likely have friends who are similar. Your going to get your highly materialist kids that try to impress each other with clothes, cars, and other stuff. There is going to be all kind of different clics, the computer/game nerds, the jocks & cheer leaders, the potheads, the bookworms, and so on. Often a teenager is member of several different groups at the same time. Each group tends to seek out independence in a different manner. Some do so without being a problem to their parents and others, but then there are those who make life hell and get into serious trouble.

I think it just depends on the teen. I"m raising my third one at this point, and so far only one of them has given us that sort of attitude. The now 22 yr old never really asked for anything, and the 15 yr old is willing to work for whatever she wants. The 18 year old, however, constantly wants to find someone to buy her this, give her that, etc.
I don't see that as seeking out independence. Expecting to have everything you wanted handed to you just because you want it is setting yourself up for a lifetime of being DEPENDENT. Working for what you want in life is working toward being INDEPENDENT, IMO.

The 18 year old, however, constantly wants to find someone to buy her this, give her that, etc.
I don't see that as seeking out independence. Expecting to have everything you wanted handed to you just because you want it is setting yourself up for a lifetime of being DEPENDENT. Working for what you want in life is working toward being INDEPENDENT, IMO.

I would agree with that. I do hope for Adrienne that something kicks in and the problem doesn't extend into her adult life. Don't want it to be an overly significant factor/weakness in finding a life long partner in life based on that person's ability to buy things. Not suggesting a person would be unhappy that way, but maybe less happy than they could be.

What about the parents that just enable their kids? I don't think that my dad and step mom know the concept of the word no. I can only imagine how Logan and Will will end up. They're not bad kids or anything, but they just get everything they want.

Is it just me or do the majority of teens today think the world owes them something? I know a lot of really good kids but they all seem to think they deserve a cell phone, freedom to do as they please, a new car, the best clothes. Are we giving to much to our kids these days?

What also come to mind that is different now than any time in the past is the Internet. Kids (teenagers) can get on line now, go into forums and mouth off as much as they want. All the moderators can do is ban them.

In the past decades, kids might have been dispectful, but they have to do it a real person. The Internet gives kids at a very young age the ability to behave any way they want without any reprocutions. If they want come into this forum and pretend to be a parent, and start posting "Screw you, you fat pig" we can't call up their parents and have further actions take. What happens is a kid gets banned, but from his perspective it is a hell of a lot of fun to indulge his dark side.

What about the parents that just enable their kids? I don't think that my dad and step mom know the concept of the word no. I can only imagine how Logan and Will will end up. They're not bad kids or anything, but they just get everything they want.

Coming from a family that was very big on "no", I worried about my sister's 3 kids as she gives them everything. Each has their own computer, tv, and dvd player in their room; their own cell phone; their own car when they get their licenses; over $1,000 in gifts for Christmas; and pretty much any big ticket item them really want. My sister and BIL are not that wealthy; they go into debt to spend this way.

But her kids are really great. The two oldest are among the most sensible, mature, polite, focused kids I've ever met (the youngest is still figuring it out :)). They also have done wonderfully in school and in extracurricular activities. It's a bit puzzling as my sister would be the first to admit she had serious issues with parenting young kids.

We're still going to say "no" a lot more frequently, however.

Yeah, it really depends on the kid I think. And yes, teens will probably have really bad attitudes at some point.

I know kids who have everything given to them, that are great responsible kids, and I know others who are spoiled even though their parents did everything "right"

One thing I want to mention though, since I was a teen not that long ago, is that sometimes teens are disrespected for no reason at all, this happens especially with strangers.

I can recall stuff like what Kaytee posted, where we were playing a game and someone came up and really rudely told us to cut it out, as though they didn't need to ask us nicely just because we were "bad teens" in their eyes. That's where a lot of the attitude comes in, from my experience. Teens are taught to respect their elders, but many many times, their elders do not respect them. So it's a difficult situation I guess.

Overall though, being a teen is tough. Whether you get everything you want or not, it's tough. You don't know who you are, what you want, or what you are going to do with your life, and that is stressful, even if they don't let on that they worry about those things. JHMO :)

I know that if I acted the way I see so many kids acting nowadays my mom would have taken me over her knee no matter how old I was. Figuring out your independence is one thing but straight disrespect is another. I have seen a kid tell his mom to F off in public and not get in any trouble. My kids get most of what they want by earning it.

I was taught that material things really aren't that important, and it stuck. I didn't have to have the nicest $150 jeans or the latest Michael Jordan Nike shoes. THen again, I didn't deal with some of the pressures because of the area I grew up in. I grew up in the middle of a 1200 acre dairy farm with 300 kids in the high school. THere wasn't near the materialistic pressure that is found in larger communities. I'll still try to raise my daughter with the same thoughts though.

Yeah my kids aren't into material things but they also take care of their stuff. They really value it because I don't spoil them.

I hate paying full price. I think the concepts of no and personal responsibility have been lost on alot of todays teens. I had to earn my own money to pay for any item that my parents considered too expensive. They would pay what they were willing to pay and I had to cover the rest. I buy both kids clothes and lots of my own at Savers. I can get brand name stuff super cheap. It just makes sense. I love to find a bargin....thanks to grandma I always have. I have heard teens cuss and demand things of their parents in the store and the parents do/say nothing. I would have been picking myself up off the floor. So far in the woods I haven't seen any teen act like that.

The GoodWill down here has a lot of designer clothes. Sometimes they still have the tags. I look there a lot. Especially with how fast these kids grow. I have a little Dior dress that Isabella wore which I got from a second hand store that I am sending to my brother. All four of my daughter have worn it and now his will too. I paid like $6.00 for it. I'd say I got my money out of that one and it is still in wonderful condition.

Exactly. I get old navy jeans for me for $4 to $8 bucks. Same for both kids. I looked through the paper this sunday and 2t jeans on sale were $8 bucks. I pay half that.

Love Old Navy sales. Especially because their kid pants have the adjustable waist for my skinny minnies.

Love Old Navy sales. Especially because their kid pants have the adjustable waist for my skinny minnies.

You're not kidding. My 4 year old can still wear 24 month old pants in the waist. She still only weighs 28 pounds. Thank god for adjustable waists!

You're not kidding. My 4 year old can still wear 24 month old pants in the waist. She still only weighs 28 pounds. Thank god for adjustable waists!
what a peanut :grin: Bubba is about 33lbs :o

You're not kidding. My 4 year old can still wear 24 month old pants in the waist. She still only weighs 28 pounds. Thank god for adjustable waists!

Josephine weighs a whole whopping 48 pounds at almost nine years old. I understand completely.

Im at the other end of the spectrum here... I buy most everything my kids and i have from designer brands. I work hard for what i have though so i am def. humble about it. My kids on the other hand are way too spoiled for their own good, and that is completely my fault. Not much i can do know, they are used to it! I think a lot of how i am though is my mothers fault. She has designer EVERYTHING and through junior high and high school started buying myself and my siblings those things too. So once i was out on my own, i had to figure out a way to fend for myself and I did just that! So i guess it all depends on the means that you have and how you have been raised previously to determine how you will raise your kids in this generation. But i do think most kids expect their parents to pay for everything and give them everything they want. And unfortunately i only see it getting worse!! AHHH!

Because kids are so uniquely different, some will have a natural tendency to get caught up in materialism, and others will not. I see it only as a problem when it leads to a unhappy life or causes problems for others. Nothing wrong with wanting and having nice things. Its bad when a person can only afford a 20,000 car, and buys 38,000 car because it is nicer.

Our daughter is not into having material THINGS or having things for the purpose of status, it just not part of her personality. She's a very social person and would rather have money to do things that allows her to be sociable with others. In some ways it doesn't matter to her if doing things with her friends cost money or not, just socializing is what is fun. When she goes shopping at the mall with her friends, the best part is just looking at things they don't plan to buy. Her friends might really want to buy this or that, but most of the time she doesn't seem to really care to buy anything. If there is anything she does like is getting school clothes, but even that isn't really too bad.